Working in the field of mental health, I can see just how much progress has been made in terms of reducing the stigma around the subject. Individuals of all different ages, genders, cultures, religions and abilities are now standing up and speaking out more than ever before about their own stories and struggles, their obstacles and their recoveries. Saying this, we do still have a long, long way to go, and the stigma still lingers in our society. One of the most vital aspects attached to this is the language we use – language which, most of the time, we use with no ill intent, but that has become so normal in our day-to-day lives that we are not even aware of the consequences. The way we talk about mental health has the potential to make a huge difference and by becoming aware of the words in which we are using, we can help reduce the isolation and alienation that some members of the community can experience around mental health, and encourage that difficult conversation to happen, without the judgment and negative perceptions attached to it.
So what are some phrases and words we should be avoiding? And what should we be saying instead?
- “Committed” suicide – this comes from the times when suicide was a crime and it is a phrase laced with blame and stigma. Although leading mental health organisations have strongly advised against using this phrase, it is still a common occurrence both in the media and in our day to day lives. Just like physical health conditions, suicide should not be viewed through the lense of “moral responsibility” and it is important that we catch ourselves and others when using this phrase, in order to challenge the stigma surrounding it.
Instead say … died by suicide, took their own life, completed suicide.
- Saying you’re “a bit OCD” when you care about cleanliness may seem like a harmless, throwaway comment, but actually it can really result in increased misunderstanding of the seriousness of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which can prevent those who do experience it from reaching out for help. It also devalues the distress and anxiety experienced by these individuals and can act as a barrier to recognising that they have it. Similarly saying “I’m so depressed” when something trivial goes wrong, or that something makes “me want to cut my wrists/die” is also extremely devaluing and harmful, especially if the person on the receiving end of that conversation has experience with these issues.
Instead say … well, nothing really. Be aware when you do use the phrase and cut yourself off before saying it. If you’d really like to reduce the stigma around these common mental health disorders, why not do a bit of research?
- So and so is a “Psycho” – I cannot TELL you how many times I’ve heard this phrase and it’s one that really grinds my gears. Why? a) it’s a term usually used by a male when they don’t understand a females behaviour and b) it is extremely derogatory to those experiencing mental health issues. This terminology can actually be really dangerous and perpetuates those age old myths that those suffering with mental illnesses are “crazy”; it can really trivialize mental health, which is the opposite of what we want to be achieving. It also conjures up the image of the individual being a dangerous person, which we know to be false – individuals with mental health issues are more likely to be victims of crime than perpetrators.
Instead say … Ask yourself some questions: I don’t really understand this beahviour; can I/do I want to learn more about it? Can I interact with someone going through this? Can I challenge my friends/peers/colleagues when they say this? Can I use a different word to describe this behaviour? e.g. instead of saying “my ex-girlfriend is a psycho”, try “my ex-girlfriend is a highly emotional individual who has a tendency to make unwise, unusual and erratic decisions” – how much more sophisticated does that sound?!
- “Suffering/Sufferer” of mental illness. Even to me, this just rolls off the toungue without even thinking about it. I spoke to my therapist about this a couple of years ago, when I referred to myself as a sufferer of ED. And it’s true, I’m not saying we don’t suffer when we have these conditions; we absolutely do. However, it keeps us in the “victim” mindset and implies we have a poorer quality of life, which is not necessarily true.
Instead say … A person with a mental health issue/an individual experiencing schizophrenia/depression/anxiety etc/someone who has a diagnosis of …
- “An anorexic/bulimic/self-harmer etc” – This is such an important one, and lies in the basic premise that we are not our mental health “issues”. Just like above, we experience these things, but they are not our lives, they are not our identity, they are not us, and our language should reflect this.
Instead say … Just as above use “experiences/has a diagnosis” etc. A person who self-harms. A person with Depression. A person with Anorexia.
Please remember that your words matter and it is all of our responsibility to reduce the stigma and discrimination within mental health. Language is powerful: use it.
Love,
Kirsty
xxx
Instagram: @thekirstyway
You can visit Mind to learn more about different mental health conditions, stigma, self-help and support.
(cover image from https://www.mawer.com/the-art-of-boring/blog/language-matters-2/)
The Kirsty Way 